


Take The Blame

by zach_stone



Category: Until Dawn (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Josh trying to place blame, Pre-main gameplay, this is super angsty with no happiness i'm sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-05
Updated: 2015-10-05
Packaged: 2018-04-24 21:36:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4936207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zach_stone/pseuds/zach_stone
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the police station the morning after Beth and Hannah disappear, Josh mentally goes through the events of the night and tries to place blame on someone, anyone, for his sisters going missing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Take The Blame

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry this is purely angst and self-loathing and sadness, but it came into my mind and I had to do it. Poor Josh.

“We’ll have three more search units out as soon as possible, Mr. Washington. I assure you, we’re doing everything we can to find your daughters.”

The detective hangs up her phone and walks over to talk to a police officer in a low voice. Josh, sitting on a bench in the police station, watches the two whisper with a frown. He can feel seven pairs of eyes on him, as his friends warily wait for him to speak. He flicks his gaze over to Chris, who gives him a weak smile.

 

_He’s not sure who started the competition between them; at first they’d just been drinking, passing bottles back and forth and talking about stupid shit. Chris had been going on and on about Ashley, and Josh had cracked some joke about how he needed to get the balls to just ask her out already, maybe he just needed some more liquid courage. And then of course, it had devolved. Josh vaguely remembers Chris boasting that he could outdrink anyone, and Josh, who knew he could drink all his friends under the table, had asked, “Is that a challenge, Cochise?”_

 

Josh feels anger burn in his throat; Chris’s idea to get so fucking wasted. Chris’s idea to get them both so drunk they passed out cold for hours, unable to stop his sisters from running out into the snowstorm. He turns away from his best friend. Chris’s fault.

 

_He has a faint recollection of Beth’s voice, saying something about seeing someone outside. He remembers her hand slapping him, something about outdoing them all. He’d just groaned, too out of it to wake up. He remembers her shaking him violently later, and it’d felt like his head was swimming in thick soup, he couldn’t shake the alcohol-heavy weight from his brain. Later, it was Sam’s voice calling his name, pushing him hard._

_“Josh, wake the hell up!” she said, finally shoving him hard enough that his upper body slipped off the counter. He jerked awake._

_“Ugh, what the fuck?” he mumbled. He mouth felt like sandpaper and his head was throbbing. “Jesus, I feel like shit.”_

_“Beth and Hannah are missing,” Sam said urgently. Josh squinted at her._

_“Huh?” he said. He looked around the kitchen, which was filled with early morning sunlight. Chris was awake, too, standing by the sink with a glass of water and looking grim as Ashley talked to him about something. Emily and Jess stood beside them, both looking anxious. Josh felt a wave of nausea hit him and he stumbled forward, nudging past his friends to puke in the sink. The girls made noises of disgust, and Chris said, “Damn, bro.”_

_“Here,” Sam said, handing him a glass of water and an ibuprofen._

_He took a sip, closing his eyes against the brightness of the room. “What time is it?”_

_“A little after 8:30,” she replied. “Josh, Hannah and Beth have been gone since like two in the morning.”_

_“What do you mean, gone?”_

_“It was a stupid prank,” Jess said, sounding upset. “We didn’t mean anything by it, but Hannah ran out into the storm and Beth followed her--”_

_“What the fuck?” Josh said, turning to glare at her. “They were out in the storm? And no one went to look for them?”_

_“It was practically a blizzard out there, we couldn’t see shit,” Emily cut in. “The snow finally let up about thirty minutes ago.”_

_“Mike and Matt are already outside looking,” Sam said._

_“They’ve been gone all night long, why didn’t you guys wake me up before?” Josh said, still seething. God, his head hurt._

_“We didn’t know they wouldn’t come back!” Jess said. “We figured Beth would find Hannah and calm her down like usual, and then they’d come back in. So we just left the door unlocked and went to bed.”_

_“I tried to stay up to wait for them, but I fell asleep,” Sam said. “When they weren’t back this morning, we woke you and Chris up. I promise, Josh, we did everything we could--”_

_“Bullshit,” he said. Then he turned to the sink and threw up again._

 

Sam touches his arm. “Josh? It’s gonna be okay. They’re gonna find them.”

He yanks his arm away from her. “Don’t,” he says.

“Hey man, we’re really sorry,” Mike says. Josh could strangle him. Sitting there, the fucking prick that poor Hannah had been so in love with, who used that crush to make his baby sister feel like shit -- and then he has the _audacity_ to apologize to Josh now, with his sisters missing and no trace of them under all the fresh snow? Fuck Mike. Fuck all of them. It’s their fault his sisters left the safety of the lodge last night. Their fault.

 

_“Hannah! Beth!” Josh called, scanning snow for any trace of his sisters. Chris walked a few steps behind him, kicking at the ground to see if he could find any hint of where the twins had run off to. Every step, Josh expected to see his sisters in a pile on the ground, their skin blue from cold, dead._

_“Hey man, maybe we should go to the cable car station and call the cops,” Chris said. “I mean, I’m just getting kind of worried. I don’t think we’re gonna find anything.”_

_“Yeah, maybe you’re right,” Josh said, finally tearing his gaze away from the woods and looking at Chris. “Fuck. Fuck this goddamn snow! There’s no way to tell where they went.”_

_“I’m sure police will have better ways to track them or whatever,” Chris said. “Don’t they have dogs that could pick up their scent or something?”_

_“Probably. Okay. Yeah, you’re right, let’s go.” He turned back towards the cabin. “Do you know what happened last night?”_

_“No idea, man, I was passed out like you. Ash said they tricked Hannah into thinking Mike wanted to hook up with her? I think they even filmed it.”_

_“Assholes,” Josh growled. Chris looked at him with concern._

_“It was just a prank,” he said. “They didn’t mean for this to happen. No one knew the storm was gonna get so bad last night.”_

_“Yeah… fucking storm.”_

 

The weather had really done a number on the place, and even with the dogs sniffing around everywhere, they couldn’t catch a scent. It doesn’t help that no one has even the faintest idea which way the girls would have gone. Josh curses the stupid snow, the way it covered the estate like a blanket, probably taking his sisters with it. The weather. It’s the weather’s fault his sisters are gone.

His phone rings. _Dad_ , the caller ID says. He answers. “Hello?” he says dully.

“Josh, you want to tell me what the hell is going on up there?” his dad barks on the other line. “How are your sisters just _missing_? How does that happen, Joshua?”

“I don’t know, Dad,” he says, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Our friends, they--”

“Josh, I put you in charge when I let you kids go up to the lodge this weekend. You’re the oldest, I expect you to be responsible.”

“C’mon, pops, we all know Beth’s the only responsible one out of all of us,” he says, but his weak attempt at humor falls flat.

“Don’t give me that shit, son,” his dad says. “I already checked with your mother, and she told me several bottles from our liquor cabinet are missing. I’m sick of this, Joshua. As if you don’t have enough problems without you getting yourself wasted all the time--”

“Stop.” Josh grits his teeth. “Dad, come on, please, you know I’m trying.”

“Not trying hard enough,” Mr. Washington says. “Your sisters are missing because you weren’t being responsible. God willing, the police will find them soon, but Josh… I’m very disappointed.”

Josh hangs up the phone, unable to bear his father’s words anymore. Everyone is now pointedly _not_ looking at him, and the hot waves of rage that have been washing over him since Sam woke him this morning are replaced with guilt and shame. He was supposed to be the leader that weekend, the one making sure everyone had a good time. But early in the evening his mood had plummeted, and his medication made him feel bloated and gross, and so he’d started drinking, pulling Chris away from Ashley to keep him company in the kitchen. He’d isolated himself, unable to get into the cheery mood he always put on for parties. He hadn’t meant to get so fucking wasted -- he’d only intended to drink enough to loosen himself up again -- but nevertheless, he’d made a stupid choice. All the anger he’d felt towards his friends and the storm turned to him. He’s the one who should have been there for his sisters. He’s the one who let them down. He tries to remember the last thing he said to either of them, and knows it was probably something irritable, brushing off their concern as he went to get drunk. It’s his fault, he realizes. Worthless older brother, never able to be there when it really mattered.

Josh’s fault.

 

 


End file.
